Promises for the New Year or how do I know my dragon? | | Culture

December 31, 2017
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Culture

December 30, 2017

Now is the time to sum up the results of the past year and boldly make plans for the next year. Marina Kingolts – psychotherapist, member of the Professional Psychotherapeutic League of the Russian Federation, psychotherapist of the unified Register of Professional Psychotherapists EAP (European Association of Psychotherapy) prepared for us almost artistic material about how to deal with promises and why it is so important to write fairy tales for oneself.


– While you believe in fairy tales, you are a magician, – a deer noticed .

"My fairy tale remained under the tree, somewhere in the woods," the sweet Eris answered softly.

"There are no trees in your forest." A fairy tale in a pocket. With the right, the deer affectionately embraced the girl and thought: "How to distinguish lies from fantasy …?"

In December, a person thinks – how was his year? With a heavy trot in iron boots or a calm path, he paced to the goal? Or maybe he was wandering in the woods, and at some point he lost his way? About each year you can compose your fairy tale, where people and circumstances turn into heroes. You are also a hero, and in your tale of the year – you are the main one.

One person told me his universal fairy tale. It repeats itself every year. The symbols are the same, but the characters are different. He says that his fairy tale is enchanted, as, indeed, he himself. His dream is a symbol of a foal in a fairy tale. Every year he buys a foal. He takes care of him, feeds him, and the dream turns into a steed. He dresses him in incredibly beautiful outfits and … goes to fight the dragon. The dragon is an enemy, he always appears at the end of the year, in the fall. If he does not hear, suddenly, the distant rumble of danger, he misses. Sometimes he looks for someone else's dragon, so that the heat of fire habitually scorched it inside. And he suffers. Usually. A little drunk and cheerful from the struggle. And this is also habitual. But the consciousness that from year to year he repeats his fairy tale takes him to a strange sadness. Sadness of non-renewal.

Because he never killed a dragon ….

Sometimes he talks cheerfully to his friends on New Year's Eve. And they, of course, ask him questions.

"Why did not you kill your dragon, or did not have the spirit, or will, and who is your dragon?"

He thinks for a long time over the answer, and does not respond quickly:

– These are my promises for the year … I promise myself different situations: lose weight, get rich, become perfect …. See the penguin, go for regular fitness, do not swear with relatives, go to bed at 22.00, same nit … In general, different unrealizable things.

I can not kill the dragon.

My promises growl, take off, turn into a headache, are remembered on the back of my conscience.

I can not kill the dragon.

Here is an interesting fairy tale ….

Why are our promises so illusory in embodiment? Promises are dreams, like balloons flying into the New Year's sky. Or goal-intent, with the pressure inscribed in a new diary, which smells so fresh future. Or a ghostly certainty that we can. We can hang the lock out of the will, and throw emotions like trash from the top shelf, where there is only a cat with its surprised look. Or there is no one there at all.

Why does this happen to our promises? Why is it so difficult to follow the plan of your own transformation? Because we do not change. In 99% of cases. It's almost never. We can change life according to its plan, but not ourselves. 1 The remaining percentage is a mysterious percentage. And he, of course, looms in consciousness with an incredible opportunity. And no one knows for sure how it works in your fairy tale. And why do you suddenly kill your dragon. And desires will turn into accessible things, situations or sensations.

Sometimes, in 1% of the case and so: the dragon is fabulous, his wings are soft, the heart is kind. To kill him is a crime. But even his gentle whisper is a living fire from your ear. And to keep the balance of friendship and danger in the unthinkable, will help you to take off with your dragons in an embrace, highly and smoothly.

Tell yourself a tale of your year, feel like a hero and find out your dragon this year!

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